badgirl with anxiety

To feel trapped, with no way out

By your own feelings

To just want all these things,

Love to play with feelings, thoughts, touches

And all you think is, this is bad. It will hurt

Others. It's wrong. Bad. Not good. A sin.

Your mind technically tells you:

'You are wrong. There is something wrong with you. 

You're not supposed to be this way. You should be 

nice. Only that way others will like you, are you 

going to be accepted, will you find true happiness.'

And yet. The only one I hurt most

In all this time

Is myself. By not fighting but complying. 

It seemed easier. 

Just to let others decide your boundaries and your likes.

To what is supposed to be right. 

But that is no way of living. That's being lived. 

Learning to be constricted by yourself

While I could do anything, if I just tapped into this confidence. 

If I just feel the strenght I actually have

If I accept myself for who I am or want to try to be

I could rule the world