Wat is het leven toch mooi met al dat gezooi en geflikflooi Het zou zo fantastisch moeten zijn zo veilig en fijn Waar het bij anderen te makkelijk gaat, kom ik niet eens bij stap één Ach ja, dan eindig ik maar alleen. Liever alleen met Hem dan met z'n twee, is mijn angst toch nog ergens goed voor. Er verandert nu zo veel, misschien verbaas ik mezelf nog eens.

Ticking, slowly Stealing sanity away Do I find this fun Or is this some pretend, A yellow fog, Of liquid and vast Although I stay happy No way to escape But it's okay I've agreed to this Hope it's over soon I'll be on my own But not  alone

So much pain And desperation Can lay in a word Hope and lost, So close together Are in six letters Time and space Stories, untold Forgotten Tears, anger, hate The time we have And we don't, Cold eyes, closed off Lost, piece by piece By not just one person All around... Cancer

Start after it ends It drives me crazy Mocks me, you could've done better I choose not to listen But it crashes me soon anyway 'You're behind on everything', it whispers, makes my heartrate fly up Lists of things, incomplete Fly through my head, there's no end I breathe and tickle Till it goes away a bit Will have forgotten this tomorrow Better days feel as lies now

Grasping, releasing Letting free and contain Like wind breezes Thoughts framed Confusion about recognition, Too shy to ask Wine clouded mind Life is such a task Should I share this Or shouldn't I have said this It all doesn't matter Life is such a mess A nice mess sometimes though

My thoughts filled with what if I did? or what if I would? Every alternate reality Tickling eyes Too good at pretend even if I don't Neat and tidy appearance while chaos overflows In so much pain while nobody knows I'm so much better at hiding than I ever thought

Streaks of gold, Molten into rings Links to the past Last for so long Strong and mighty Lightly walk my feet Lead me in Your steps Kept me safe, forever

So many sides of me Undiscovered I'm starting to see How much I got to offer Please don't let this be just a high Before a low, Awesomeness just in sight That live's gotta show

It's so good to be cared for It's so lovely to be truely welcome somewhere It's wonderful to come home